Satyagraha. Well sort of.

Amid the return of the cold war, the merging of the real and unreal, Esther might save us all. While Putin and his chums might have elevated performance art into reality by promoting a constant state on uncertainty, he has overlooked one vital fact. Esther. Whilst listening to the Today programme over Brexit, Esther heard story about Putin. And quick as a flash replied “the radio said farting and putin”. Now call me a dunce but she is onto something here. If we could convince the west to replace the Putin with the phrase “Farting and Putin” or better yet a farting noise read out by the actor who used to do Gerry Adams on the BBC, Putin’s authority would surely ebb away. No man can keep his dignity if reduced to a mere farting noise. Clearly not. And in fact now whenever I hear Putin mentioned, I’m sent into a scatological reverie and the fear of chemical warfare recedes into nothingness.

 

Thank you Esther. Now all we need to do is get #fartingandputin trending on twitter and on the gram and all might be well. Maybe.

 

Beyond her geopolitical savvy she remains a delightful child but one who struggles to hear the word “no” without melting into bombast and general horror.  It’s as if she is consumed by a small angry bear as she pounds her fist against the floor. I’m sure this will pass but watching her face turn puce for the 8 time over some seemingly minor infraction can result in some anglo-saxon language being used. She continues to patronise Tove with gusto- occasionally veering into the over eager which manifests itself in terrifying ways like covering her mouth or trying to use TOve’s head as a seat. Which results in a rebuke from her parents and her being swallowed by that aforementioned angry bear.

 

But it is all good fun. When she is on form she is delight, even if she is slightly too quick to call you either a “poo poo willy willy fart fart” or “bumhole.”